I am currently scheduled for a c-section on Jan 21st (that's 11 days from now). I know it's not far away, but geesh, I wouldn't mind if he came sooner than that!!! My entire mid section and back are in constant pain. I had no idea one could be so uncomfortable. I don't remember any of this from my first pregnancy...but then again I was only 24! This baby is also breech, maybe that causes a little more discomfort. Or, perhaps it's the fact that this baby is going to be "significantly larger than my last baby" according to the doctor. (Thank God I'm having a c-section!) Either way, I am miserable. (Happily Miserable!)
I am trying not to be impatient. Us infertiles know how annoying it is to hear us cry and complain about not being pregnant and then continue to cry and complain when we do get pregnant. But, infertile or not - this part is PAINFUL!
I am a little more than 38 weeks along. I had already given birth to my first son by now. So, in all reality this is the longest pregnancy I have ever had. (I am sure those of you who have gone past your due date have a word or two for me =) I'm being a baby...I'll admit it.
To be honest though, I feel like I have been waiting for this for years...maybe because I have. It isn't like it's just been the anticipation of a typical 40 week pregnancy. I have literally been waiting to give birth to a child that I have loved in my heart for almost ten years. I have been anticipating the birth of this child for a very very long time.
I would say the waiting has been the hardest part, but really I'm not sure. It could have been the three pregnancy losses, or the cancer (yeah, probably the cancer), or the multiple surgeries and procedures to 'correct' my problems, or the IVF...three times, or the pills, or the hormone shots, or the giant shots in my bum (don't miss those), or the many disappointments along the way, or the financial strain, or the uncertainty...it all sucked actually. But the end result will be beautiful - a baby boy that we have prayed and waited for. A true miracle child...and he will be ours...and he will be here soon. I've come this far...what's 11 more days.
I can wait. I know that. I don't want to...but I
have already proven that I can!
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| There it is at 38 weeks! |
Oh, I know how hard the waiting is!! Its the worst! But, as soon as you see your baby boy you will forget all of he pain and misery that you went through to get him. The thoughts of being an infertile don't go away... but it seems less of a daily burden in your life. I can't wait to hear about the birth of your little guy! He will be kicked out of the womb soon :)
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