Well, first there's my whole rebelling uterus. The c-section that went terrible wrong. (Exhibit A.)
Then, Four days after Liam was born we went to the Pediatrician's office, it started out as a typical appointment. He just wanted to check his jaundice and weight. We were shocked to find that Liam had lost a pound in four days. I was nursing every 3 hours around the clock, but I had a feeling my milk was not coming in as it should. My breast never felt full or heavy. So, the doctor told us we needed to supplement with formula - just for a couple of days or weeks until my milk was more established. So, we went home and I started pumping in between feedings and offering the bottle after the breast. In a matter of just a few hours Liam became very lethargic. He eventually lost interest in eating completely. He would not latch on to my breast and would not take the bottle either. By evening, it was evident we had a problem. This child who had already lost too much weight had only eaten and ounce (if that) all day. So, we called the doctor. Of course, in the midst of trying to explain to the nurse what was going on I broke down in tears - sobbing really. She couldn't understand what I was saying and I couldn't stop crying. The doctor eventually got on the phone and told us to take the baby to the Children's Hospital to be evaluated. So we did. (Exhibit B.)
As soon as we arrived at the hospital they took us back to the ER. After a quick observation of the listless baby and some very low blood sugar numbers they admitted Liam for neo-natal dehydration. We spent the next two days in the hospital. Even though I knew that this was all caused by my lousy milk supply, the doctors still wanted to do a complete Sepsis work up to rule out any infection. This is standard protocol for a newborn with these symptoms. They ran a gamut of horrible tests while my husband and I stood in the hallway and cried. It was horrible. The whole time this was going on I was in pain from my incision and my feet were about four times their size. My body had collected a lot of fluid during the delivery and had not been able to expel it yet. I was miserably uncomfortable -barely able to walk. And I knew that it was because of me and my failing body that my baby was being poked and prodded and screaming his head off. (Exhibit C)
Our stay in the hospital was horrible to say the least. The hospital staff were WONDERFUL, they took great care of us and our baby! It just was not how we wanted to spend our first few days with our newborn. The hospital room was equipped with a crib for Liam and a day bed for a parent - problem was...I couldn't lay down because of my incision pain. I was till having trouble getting in and out of chairs. So, I spent the first night sitting in a hard plastic rocking chair - with absolutely no sleep. Early the next morning the nurse came in and asked if we needed anything - and that was it...I lost it. I realize now it was a combination of stress, lack of sleep, hormones, and pain, but that poor nurse - I am sure she regretted coming in to that room. I couldn't stop crying - the kind of cry where you can't catch your breath. I had hit rock bottom and I knew it. (Exhibit D)
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| Our sweet boy at Wolfson's Children's Hospital. |
Later that day, the sweet nurse had worked out a way for them to bring in a hospital bed for me to sleep in. Praise the Lord for her! It was that afternoon that I finally got some sleep maybe 90 minutes or so, but it was 90 minutes more than I had had in the last 5 days.
Most of our stay spent in the hospital was focused on increasing my milk supply. The hospital provided a breast pump for me and formula to supplement. I was nursing one hour and then pumping the next. It seemed like every hour something was attached to my boob. Even with that I still wasn't making enough milk. Gawh! (Exhibit E)
We were finally released on Sunday (we went in on Friday) after all of Liam's tests came back with good results, his sugar had leveled out, and his sodium and potassium levels were normal. On the way home from the hospital I thought - we are finally going to get back to normal...or not.
We were home for for about 12 hours before I noticed that my incision looked funny. It was bleeding a little and I knew it shouldn't be. I called the doctor - and they told me to come in. The doctor examined the incision and said it looked ok - but I had overdone it and needed to take it easy (easier said then done!). He told me if I wasn't careful I would most likely develop an infection. Of course I would! (Exhibit F)
It has now been about a week and things have seemed to settle down - or so I thought. I woke up yesterday and did not feel well. I have been taking Advill almost everyday because my abdominal area is still very sore. But, this felt different. I felt achy all over (especially in my boobs) and had chills all day. I finally decided to take my temperature and sure enough I had a fever! I called the doctor (again) and after explaining my symptoms she was pretty certain that I had Mastitis (an infection in the milk duct). Of course I do. (Exhibit G)
So there you have it - proof that my body is a complete failure. From my hostile uterus to my stingy boobs - I've had it!
Although, on a good note I have lost ALL of the weight that I gained during this pregnancy. So I guess there's always that!
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